For just $500, Linkin Park superfans can now cuddle with 3-D printed replicas of their favorite band members while crying themselves to sleep every night.
The pioneers of angsty middle schoolers’ favorite kind of rap-rock* have partnered with German-American 3-D printing startup Staramba, which specializes in “celebrity replicas,” to create photorealistic figurines of themselves. Staramba scanned all six band members–man-buns, ear gauges, sleeve tats, and all–and printed out their mini-mes in polymer clay.
“You always wanted to hold your star in your arms?!? As close as no normal fan ever gets?!” Staramba writes on their website. “We say: Let’s do it!”
The 14” tall, 1:5 scale models–of band members Mike Shinoda, Chester Bennington, David Farrell, Brad Delson, Rob Bourdon, and Joe Hahn–go for $500 each, despite not even having buttons that make them sing “So insecure!” or other great Linkin Park lyrics. A limited run of 99 figurines are being made of each musician at this size. But if you recently blew all your money getting “In the end, it doesn’t even matter” tattooed on your forearm, Staramba’s budget option is a $149 1:10 scale model. There’s also a $249 1:20 scale model of the entire band standing in front of some spooky artwork, so you can make them headbang at make-believe mini nu-metal shows in your bedroom.
If you, too, are pathologically narcissistic enough to want be turned into a creepy little action figure, you can: Staramba will be bringing their scanning equipment to Linkin Park’s upcoming “Carnivores” tour, offering fans 3-D printed selfies with band members.
*The writer of this post used to scrawl Linkin Park lyrics all over her sixth-grade social studies notebooks.
Check out the Linkin Park figurines here.